The Damage & Destruction From Lies Is Poison ~ But Truth Will Set Us Free

Without a doubt, we are all guilty of lying to some extent. We learn to lie early in life to get ourselves out of trouble, to pretend we are something we are not, and to blame what we did, on someone else. Some people learn early in life, how damaging lies can be, and their conscience keeps them in check as they mature.

Other people make lying a practice, or a habit that forms a baseline for getting what they want out of life. A highly skilled liar is very difficult to detect. Lies repeated over and over, are most likely to be believed. More so, lies that are mixed with elements of truth help to advance the lies even more, because if people recognize truth in a narrative, they are more likely to believe the entire story.

Lies go right back to the Garden of Eden. In the six things God hates the most, lies top the list. In fact Satan is dubbed “the father of lies”. Lies are at the heart and mind of our very existence, and they are also a huge part of the spiritual battles surrounding us.

When detectives are investigating crimes, and they get a chance to interrogate a suspect, the number one goal is to get their original story recorded, so they have a baseline to detect discrepancies or lies, in the retelling of the story.

They know most guilty people will lie, and then get mixed up, as they are forced to tell more lies, or change their original story, to fit the evidence presented to them. As soon as the police detect a lie, they hone in on it, and with words, with evidence, and even sometimes by introducing more lies, they set the stage for the person to trap themselves. They will patiently hammer out the truth, to bring out the minute details of what actually happened.

Although there are countless famous cases of people trapping themselves in lies and contradictions, some that come to mind are Jodi Arias, Darlie Routier, and Scott Peterson. In the case of Jodi Arias, she lied and changed her story so often, she drove the prosectors and the defence crazy. Even her own lawyer begged to get off the case, because she was so wily, so slippery, and so shameless in her lies.

One of the most astounding glimpses of the power of self delusion was exhibited by Jodi Arias after her trial. Even though the death sentence was on the table, and she narrowly missed it, she continued to fabricate. There were hours and hours of graphic testimony regarding the extent and nature of the injuries she inflicted on her victim, as well as proof of premeditation. She shot him, and stabbed him repeatedly, going so far as to nearly decapitate him.

The trial also brought forward an extensive amount of evidence to prove her victim had no history of violence toward her or anyone else. Previous girlfriends, family members, and friends he partied with, or played sports with, all testified he had no history of violence, or assaults whatsoever. He had no police records of ever having assaulted anyone. She had never told anyone he assaulted her at any time during their relationship. Yet she made up yet another batch of lies to try and blame the victim, as well as tarnish his reputation when he had no chance of defending himself. No wonder Jodi’s own father was so distraught over the type of person she had become, or more aptly, the type of person she was, and always had been.

In spite of it all, after the trial was over, she stood up and described all the good she could do in prison, trivial things like starting a recycling program. Then she pulled a T-shirt out of her never ending bag of tricks, and showed off the T-shirt she was going to sell as a fundraiser for victims of domestic violence. It had “SURVIVOR” emblazoned on the front of it. She coyly claimed she was a survivor, and she understood domestic violence very well, because she had to do what she did to save herself. It was all self defence, and about being a survivor of horrific abuse. Nothing could have been more inappropriate, given the evidence at the trial. Such is the depth and breadth of self deception and delusion, as well as a flat out refusal to accept responsibility for her crime. She is a person who seems convinced that her lies must be believed, simply because she believes them herself.

Darlie Routier was a mother who stabbed her young children to death in the middle of the night, and then slashed and bruised herself, claiming an intruder had entered the house, and attacked them. She changed her story multiple times, but the essence of it was that she was asleep on the couch, and woke to a mysterious man attacking her, who then vanished. But she did not remember the attack she said, and claimed she must have gone “un-conscience”.  Wow. Was it a freudian slip, or did she actually mispronounce the word unconscious? She lied to the point of being nonsensical, and crazy.

For example, there was a cut screen in the room, along with some broken glass in another location in the rooms. Although it is a convoluted story, and changed frequently, the evidence showed the screen had been cut from a kitchen knife inside the home. There was no sign of forced entry, or even that anyone had been near the window on the outside. How would an intruder get inside the house, get the knife, and then cut the screen, without any sign of forced entry? The cut screen was staged to be the forced entry, yet the knife used was inside the house.

The knife used in the murders, was a different kitchen knife, and it was also inside the house. Although she adamantly claimed she woke up to a man attacking her on the couch, there was no blood on the couch. When questioned in detail, she claimed she could not remember, she woke up, but did not remember, she must have gone unconscious, yet she ran around all over the place, and chased the intruder.

Her blood was not on the couch, but rather in the kitchen near the sink, which pointed to self-inflicted wounds, after she attacked her sons. During the 911 call, she wailed and carried on with huge drama, instead of trying to help her children, even though one of them was still clearly alive. She told the 911 operator that when she chased the intruder, she picked up the knife. Then she had the presence of mind, to voice concerns over her DNA and fingerprints being on the knife. All of this while her son was gurgling and struggling to breathe. The police repeatedly told her to stop it, and help her children, yet she ignored the request, and wailed out her convoluted story over the phone.

In various interviews, similar to Jodi Arias, and so many others, she just dug herself in deeper. She would revert to a posture of wide eyed innocence, and talked like a child, often referring to herself in third person. She would describe herself as a normal person, a normal mother, and then ask “what normal mother turns into a psychotic killer, when she is a normal person?”  With both these women, you could tell they had learned various tactics early in life, to feign innocence, and lie their way out of trouble.

Scott Peterson was another humdinger when it came to being a pathological liar. He courted a woman, pretending to be single, while his pregnant wife was at home decorating the house for Christmas, and thinking she had the perfect life.

Scott told his mistress incredible lies, feigning that he was a high ranking executive, and travelled all over the world. He even pretended to call her from these various locations, telling her what the Eiffel tower looked like lit up at night, when in reality, he was hiding in the den of his own house just a few miles away. His mistress did not know he was married. She was set up with him on a blind date, and the entire relationship lasted only six weeks. She went to the police when she learned he had a wife, and she was pregnant and missing. The poor woman was naive, and was initially taken in by his lavish lies.

During interviews, Scott Peterson also showed a propensity to act childlike, wide eyed, and innocent. He used his good looks, with full confidence in his ability to charm, and feign innocence, especially with females. During one interview when being grilled by a woman journalist, he would gaze at her intently, then when the questions got too tough, he would simply close his eyes. Very bizarre. In all cases, when under scrutiny, these individuals showed some very flawed character traits. Their lives were poisoned by lies, and tragically, the poison of all those lies adversely affected many other innocent people.

Personally I think when some of these lying characters stare intently at the person they are trying to deceive, they stare without blinking, and hold the gaze, because they are trying to assess how effectively they are at lying to the person. They want to observe the other person’s reaction, and eye contact very closely, to be able to see if their pitch is going down as expected. When Scott Peterson would close his eyes, it was almost as though he was shutting out the fact his story was not going down well. Kind of like pulling the blinds.

In the case of Jodi Arias, her father reported that since she was a very young child, she would never tell the truth, and would never take responsibility for what she had done. The gun she used to murder her ex, was a gun she stole from her grandparents home, and then staged a burglary. Ultimately her father took his own life, because he was so disturbed by the conduct, and constant lies of his wayward daughter. It must be devastating for a parent to have a child who exhibits such traits.

One of the reasons lies are such poison, is because they are designed to change, or rob a person’s identity. For those who believe in God and trust Christ as our saviour, our identity is in Christ.

The devil wants to steal our identity, and craft it toward himself, and take us to hell, where he is headed. He achieves his goal by lying, and turning people into liars, or into his pseudo offspring, thus destroying who they are. He also seeks to destroy our credibility, and ensnare us into believing his lies. Or he attacks our identity directly, by repeatedly lying about who we are. He confuses and convolutes things too, as those are the tools of deception.

Christ made the claim in John 14:6 ” I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.” We are also told in many other places in the Bible, that the truth will set us free. Otherwise we will lose our way, lose our eternal life, and become trapped in lies. We will lose our identity in Christ, and that is precisely what the devil is after.

Freedom is found in truth, and we must learn to love the truth, and turn away from deception. It is not easy to do. We often face conflict and rejection, when we make a commitment to truth.

Sometimes, we allow deception to continue because we are trying to be nice. It doesn’t mean we should be brutally honest by telling someone they are fat, or ugly. Being mean is not at the heart of being truthful. In some cases it is better not to voice an opinion, especially if it is none of our business.

Rather, it is important to learn how to assert ourselves, instead of trying to be nice, when another person is violating boundaries, and forcing falsehoods into our own life. It is a lesson I wish I would have learned long ago.

One of the manipulations used by liars, is to force a lie or a falsehood, and then act like you are being very mean for not accepting it. They are wonderful, and you must be chopped liver, or insane, if you don’t buy into their plot.

It is one thing for a person to lie about their own life. There is not much we can do about that, except avoid them. But if they are staring me down, and pushing a lie about my life, or my relationship with them, I have every right to confront, and deny those lies. Because the continuation and repetition of lies, poisons the entire well. The more entrenched, the longer they go on, the worse it gets. Soon, those lies are not much different than what the notorious killers do. The lies become a trap, a snare, an excuse for more lies. And the goal behind every pack of lies, is destruction.

God hates lies because lies destroy our soul, our freedom, and our God-given identity. They get a foot in the door, and if you smile sweetly, they will push in with more lies, and never give up. As much as believers choose to become children of God, liars choose to become children of the devil. There is no middle ground. All lies will be revealed one day, and those who are constantly crafting lies will face the consequences at some point.

By nature, we are inclined to lie. For many of us it is the little white lies, or the omissions, or self-deception, or exaggerations, and attempts to be self important. I can look back on my own life, and recall many, many examples of allowing lies to persist because I did not have the courage to stand against them.

In other cases, I wanted to appear to be more competent or successful, or intelligent, or comical, or whatever. I wanted to impress people with knowledge, or perhaps by embellishing a story, like the fishermen tales, or the size of the bears I came across on a wilderness hike. Yet, at the end of the day, was anyone impressed? Not likely.

Truth helps strip away our pride, and helps us to be humble. It has been said there are two types of people in this world – those who have already been humbled, and those who are yet to be humbled. It does make sense. In countless ways, we are all fools. Without truth and a dose of humility, we will lose our way in a country second.

If we fail to embrace truth, one of the most sobering things about it, are the verses in the Bible warning us that God will send strong delusion, to those who refuse to love and seek the truth. In addition to the delusion, their hearts will become hardened, and eventually God will turn them over to a reprobate mind.

Of all things, I want to avoid such a fate. The thought of not even being able to discern what is true and what is false, is a frightening thought. It would be like living in a fictional story, passing back and forth from reality to delusion, and not even knowing the difference.

Lies mess with out minds. They mess with our reality. They can change who we are. They can poison large masses of people. We only need to look at what dictators, and cult leaders have done throughout history, to resonate the expanse and horror brought about by lies. How many cult leaders thought they were being spoken to by God? Or in many cases, they claimed to actually be God.

David Koresh in the Waco stand off, was a leader who thought he was God. He stockpiled massive amounts of ammunition and guns, and persisted in his delusions even when surrounded by law enforcement. It was a gruelling stand-off that went on for fifty-one days, and ended in the deaths of twenty seven innocent children, and several FBI agents.

One of the most notable things about all cults, and cultish personalities, is that once they have established a false narrative, they will not let it go. They repeat it over and over, and over again. They also take on a very dogmatic and authoritarian stance, and will punish those who refute their lies. The most persistent liars, are also the most deviant. They use a false, self appointed authority and superiority over other people.

They seem to think their own delusions can be forced onto others, based on their own perception of superiority, simply because they are deluded. I was the unfortunate target of a lying cultish  teacher. In hindsight, I can clearly see the cycle of delusion he created, in order to benefit himself. He certainly did not benefit me. He was the absolute worst “thing” ever inflicted on me, my life, and my family.

In my case, the pathological liar and high school teacher became obsessed with me as a student in school. He then told literally thousands of lies about his relationship to me, combined with a constant threat of punishment for refuting those lies. In all likelihood, he is still lying about his relationship with me. It went on for years and years. Never ending. 

He was another one who would stare without blinking. He stared because he was always trying to assess whether or not his lies were being swallowed. I remember thinking so many times I was forced to listen to him for hours on end, that I could puke right in his face.

I was not swallowing his lies. He was forcing them down my throat with a bullying false authority, and equally false cultish religious doctrine. He used his false religious beliefs like a badge of supreme authority, to add to his teacher authority, while working as a brand new teacher in a small town public school. Talk about gall. 

It never ceases to amaze me how many brazen lies he told, and how he would stare me down every chance he got, daring me to defy his absolute authority over my life. I felt like a bug under a microscope when he was staring at me. The look in his eyes was deadened and flat. There was certainly no love, or even respect for the free will of another human being. 

What is even more astounding, is that this man was twenty-eight years old at the time, and wholly obsessed with a sixteen year old student. I distinctly recall the first time he stood staring at me right after he came to the school. I was fourteen years old at the time. I had no relationship with him, prior to when he started teaching at the school. I was a student in a small school where he happened to be a delusional teacher who for some reason, was full of self righteous false authority. 

Part of the reason he targeted me was because I had accelerated through school, and had scored high on IQ tests. That seemed to fascinate him, and make him even more determined to thought reform, and take over my mind and identity. He was bound and determined to outsmart me, when what he actually did, was overpower me, because I had no defence against him. He repeatedly insisted that he was doing “what was best for Valerie.”

What a total croc of lies. I know I have to forgive him, and let it go. But he would never let me go, so the forgiveness is difficult. It’s not easy to separate the damage of all those lies from the person who did the lying. He also did a phenomenal amount of manipulation, so others would believe his lies. 

In cases where mothers kill their children, like Andrea Yates, Darlie Routier, and Lindsay Clancy, they claim they sent them to heaven so they would not have to grow up in an evil world. Brian Laundrie also claimed he killed Gabby Petito because she had begged him to kill her, so he mercifully obliged. These are self-centred delusional acts, and the heavenly or mercy claims are lies, and self-deception of the lowest degree.

In a similar vein, MAID is another large scale delusion with a twist of compassion thrown in. In all the years I worked as an RN, people who were dying were given as much morphine as they needed to keep them comfortable. Pain medication is not withheld from people with end stage cancers, or other terminal illnesses.

The notion that killing people is doing what is “best for them” is a delusion somewhat similar to the parents who kill their children, or others who claim they killed for reasons of mercy. It is not up to us to kill people, for any reason. Those who want to end the life or lives of other people, are doing so for selfish and often hidden reasons, and are delusional if they think they can justify killing people.

Anyone who thinks they know what is best for other people, to the point of using coercion and force, is not acting in the best interests of others. They are acting in their own best interests. To do so, they lie. It’s as simple as that, yet it becomes very convoluted, because all deception is a labyrinth of lies, half truths, overt lies, covert lies, and above all – self deception. Becoming delusional is a process. Delusional simply means the person believes what is false. They believe the lies.

In hindsight, the insanity of it all is painfully obvious. Lies are about self exaltation, self interests, and self protection. But when self becomes the monument, self becomes the destroyer of self, and takes many innocent lives in the process.

We cannot be perfect, but we do have the capacity to tell the truth. If we turn away from the inclination to lie, it will benefit all relationships, families, communities, businesses, politics, media, and general information sharing. In fact the more truthful and honest we become, the more appalling and obvious the lies become. Truthfulness sharpens our discernment.

For those who are atheist, or lean toward secular humanism, it is still pretty obvious that being truthful is much healthier than losing credibility, or destroying relationships by lying. When people are lied to, they feel betrayed, and hurt, because it is hard to understand why you are so insignificant to someone you love and care about. Lies cause rifts, and a loss of trust. A loss of trust erodes our relationships, and robs us of love.

Christians have a wide range of beliefs when it comes to what will happen on the final judgement day. Of course none of us really knows, and we are not the ones to determine who is in the Lamb’s book of life. From what I have read and understood about it, the judgement happens after the thousand year reign of Christ on this earth. Once He returns, there will be a thousand year time of peace and prosperity, without the Satanic deception. When Christ returns, Satan is bound and thrown into prison for a thousand years.

The judgement occurs after the thousand year time frame. Those who have died without knowing Christ will be resurrected from the dead to face judgment “according to their deeds”. Many preachers proclaim there are no second chances, and all people who did not accept Christ, will be thrown into a lake of fire. Some of them also insist the burning in the lake of fire is eternal and will go on forever.

What some fail to realize is that preaching a false gospel, is lying, and they themselves could end up in the lake of fire. Hebrews 9:27  ” As it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgement.”

It does not specifically say how each and every individual is going to be judged. Why? Because in many other verses we are told that only Christ knows the minds and hearts of people, and only He can determine who lives and who dies for all eternity. Just as we do not know the time and date of His return, we do not know the ultimate fate of all people who die.

In my own mind, there are many questions about the ultimate fate of non-believers. If all non-believers are to be thrown into a lake of fire, what would be the point of resurrecting them for a final judgement day? I think many preachers have added their own version of hellfire and damnation, when we really do not know.

Clearly, it is of utmost importance to accept Christ, repent, and have faith in the gospel before we die. But we are not the ones who have the keys to the abyss, or the knowledge to judge others. We know what God abhors based on what is written in the Bible, and we also know we all fall short, and cannot save ourselves. But beyond that, we do not know the fate of everyone else.

God is love. Love is a choice, or it would not be love. We need love, therefore we need truth in order to maintain trust, which is essential for love to exist.

It is only through God’s grace that we can even recognize our own deception, and be humbled by it, enough to repent and make changes in our lives.

A year ago, we watched the news and live feeds, as a large trucker’s freedom convoy travelled across the country, and confronted the covid mandates. The entire demonstration revolved around freedom. It was probably the largest, or at least one of the most notable demonstrations in Canadian history. For all those who participated with sincere, and peaceful motives, it was a commendable demonstration.

Knowing it is actually truth that sets us free, is quite a relief. We do not have to rely on politicians, or demonstrations, to find truth in our lives. We do not have to do anything, other than embrace and love the truth.

When it comes to truth – God has our backs. We don’t even need a truck, to get us to the place of truth. We don’t need to spin our wheels, or lose hope.

Freedom is much greater than we are. Our minds are limited. Freedom is unlimited, and eternal. Let us not allow lies, to cause us to lose our way. I will always be thankful for God’s grace, in lighting the path, to help me escape the darkness of so many lies.

Deception is without a doubt, our greatest enemy. It comes in many forms, types, shapes, and shadows. It will never take responsibility, and will bury its victims in a pit of delusion and despair. Liars will not win. It is impossible. Christ is truth, and has already claimed the victory over lies. Therefore, we would be wise – to avoid the lies.

Copyright Valerie J. Hayes and Quiet West (2022). Unauthorised use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author/owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Valerie J. Hayes and Quiet West with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.